The Desire for Equal Co-Parenting After Separation

Managing children after the end of a cohabitation or marriage is undoubtedly one of the most delicate aspects a parent faces. Increasingly, fathers and mothers turn to our firm with the desire to obtain pure alternating custody, meaning a perfectly equal division of the child's time spent with each parent. This solution, also known as shared or 50/50 placement, represents the ideal of justice and emotional continuity for many. However, as a divorce lawyer in Milan, I observe daily how legal and practical reality is often more complex than initial intentions. It is fundamental to understand that Italian law focuses not so much on the parent's right to have half the time, but on the child's right to maintain a balanced and continuous relationship with both parental figures, which does not automatically translate into a mathematical division of days.

The Regulatory Framework: Co-Parenting and the Child's Best Interest

In Italy, the cornerstone principle governing this matter is that of co-parenting, introduced by Law 54/2006. This principle establishes that a child has the right to maintain a significant relationship with both parents, even after separation. However, a fundamental technical distinction must be made between shared custody, which is now the rule and concerns the ownership of parental responsibility, and the physical placement of the child. Although custody is almost always shared, equal placement (equal time) is not automatic. Case law, both at lower and higher courts, assesses the feasibility of 50/50 on a case-by-case basis. The guiding criterion remains always the preeminent interest of the child. Judges tend to evaluate whether continuous alternation of domicile could create confusion or instability in the child, especially if young, or if the distance between the parents' homes could compromise their school and social routine. Therefore, the equal model is viewed favorably only when objective conditions exist that guarantee the child's serenity, such as good communication between parents and geographical proximity between the two homes.

The Approach of Studio Legale Bianucci to Equal Placement

The approach of lawyer Marco Bianucci, an expert in family law in Milan, distances itself from unachievable promises to focus on the practicality of the client's and the child's daily life. When a parent requests equal placement, our strategy begins with a rigorous analysis of logistical and relational feasibility. We do not limit ourselves to submitting a request to the court, but we build a solid parental project. We verify the distance between residences, working hours, and the child's school needs to demonstrate to the judge that the alternation will not be a trauma, but an asset. As a divorce lawyer with extensive experience, lawyer Marco Bianucci works to highlight the benefits of both parents' constant presence, anticipating and resolving possible objections regarding the child's stability. The goal is to reach agreements that, even if not perfectly mathematical, ensure the maximum possible presence of both parents in their children's lives, minimizing the conflict that is often the real obstacle to the acceptance of such requests.

Frequently Asked Questions

With 50/50 custody, must child support be paid?

This is one of the most debated issues. In theory, if the time spent with each parent is identical and their incomes are equivalent, one could opt for direct support, eliminating periodic payments. However, if there is a significant economic disparity between the two parents, the judge may still establish an equalization payment from the wealthier parent to ensure the child has the same standard of living in both homes.

At what age of the child can equal placement be requested?

There is no legal prohibition related to age, but case law is very cautious with very young children (under 3-4 years old). At this stage, courts tend to prefer primary placement with one parent (often the mother) to ensure a stable routine, while still allowing frequent visits from the other parent. As the child grows, the chances of obtaining equal placement increase significantly.

What happens if the parents live in different cities?

Geographical distance is one of the main obstacles to pure alternating placement. If the residences are far apart, 50/50 becomes difficult to implement because it would force the child to travel long distances to go to school or see friends, compromising their stability. In such cases, an experienced family law attorney will advise on different solutions that prioritize the quality of time spent rather than mere quantity.

Can the judge refuse 50/50 even if the parents agree?

Yes, the judge always has the power to deviate from parental agreements if they believe they are contrary to the child's best interest. However, in practice, if the parents present a well-structured consensual agreement that demonstrates it protects the child's well-being, it is very likely that the court will approve it without obstacles.

Request an Assessment of Your Case in Milan

The choice of custody arrangement is a decision that will influence your children's future for many years. If you are considering the possibility of alternating custody or want to understand how best to manage child placement after separation, it is essential to proceed with awareness. Lawyer Marco Bianucci is available at the firm at via Alberto da Giussano, 26 in Milan, to analyze your specific situation and outline the most appropriate strategy. Contact us today to schedule an appointment and discuss your needs with the utmost confidentiality and professionalism.